Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Noël Wells *O*

*Cheesy weeaboo emoticons warning*
*Unstructured post minor warning*
Also : I feel like nomming on lettuce.

So, a few weeks ago a friend of mine posted this on Facebook :

I thought "AWWWW who is this cute, talented, silly, funny 16 y.o.? :O" and then ":DDDD" and then "°ω° <3" like a total pedobear.

So I proceeded to stalk her channel and watch her other videos. I watched this :

(It then appeared to me by the age of the 2 guys with her that she's probably a little bit older than 16 years old. Yay! Might not be pedobearing!)

Then I watched this :


Which prompted me to watch this :

Oh gawd. I don't know jack about current US presidential election candidates but whatever she is parodying, THIS IS SO GOOD AND SO FULL OF AWESOME I'M BARFING RAINBOWS AND SHOOTING STARS OUT OF MY EYES. BAAAAAARRRRRR ( *O*)===*****=**=*==
I watched it again... and again... (no, I wasn't fappin.) and shared it with whoever I could.

Oh gawd, this girl is -Le awesome. The priceless facial expressions. The moves. The lyrics. The overall presentation. Plus she can sing! (And damn, she's sexy in that video, all that rubbing... :V)


I watched some of her other videos before I proceeded to stalk her blog and twitter like she was the best thing after sliced bread, the Internet, gay bacon strips, string cheese and Tropicana juice. No, in fact she stands more somewhere around the gay bacon strips. Actually, SHE EVEN SEEMS TO TASTE LIKE TASTY TASTY FRESH GAY BACON STRIPS.

So I learned somewhere in the stalking process, much to my amazement, that she was 24 years old (recently turned 25) and therefore, older than me! Ogawd! I also learned (amongst other things) that she feels old and that she's single. NOOO HOW CAN THAT BEEEEEEEEEE. She can't be single, that's imfuckingpossible. D:

And then I saw this :

Nooooooo! Don't be saaaaaad ;O; <333333
This is so sad ;O;
My heart cried. I just want to hug her and squee her and give her tons of love and never let go. I can so relate.
So now I've taken on tweeting her whenever I can think of something that could bring a smile without it appearing like a desperate attempt from a creepy fat old guy posing as a girl to hit on her with naughty comments, in the hopes that it helps her feel less ronery. :c
(But yes, I am a creepy fat old guy inside. Hur hur hur.)
(It's not the reason why I'm doing it though, although creepy fat old guys can relate because they too have a heart and are secretery ronery, it's not the reason why I'm doing it.)

PLEASE, SOMEONE, SAVE THIS LOVELY LADY FROM HER RONERINESS. :( This is so sad. I don't know her personally but I'm sure she's lovely and needs tons of hugs. :(

Back to her videos.

I didn't know about Zooey Deschanel before watching her "Hey! The Zooey Deschanel Show" parodies. I actually looked the girl up only today. It's what inspired me to write this blog entry in the first place.
So I watched a few vids of Zooey Deschanel (the original). I noticed that her eyes seldom seem to be expressing anything when she performs, besides something that looks like she's in a constant state of terror asking herself "WHERE AM I? D: WHAT AM IT DOING HERE? DDD: WHAT IS THIS? DDDDDDD: WHY DO I EVEN EXIST? DDDDDDDDDDDDD:  ...  DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:".

See what I mean : 
video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player

And then, there is this :

LOL! She gives a much better show than Zooey does.

Now watch this :

And then watch this :

It's just so unbelievable how well Noël nailed her down and there is so much comedic value added by the fact that the parody came out 10 months before the actual interview and that some of the subjects addressed in the interview were addressed by Noël in her parody. LOL.

Please, watch this too. It's hilarious. One of my favs.

Ok. I'm a total Noël fangirl and the girl boner I have for her has exploded 3 pairs of pants up to now. I want us to rub machine gun titties together.

Yaaaaaay! \\\\\\\\\\o/

Anyway, ALL this to say, WATCH HER SHIT. She's funny. I hope she gets on TV or whatever she wants to happen to happen.