Sunday, November 10, 2013

Kids who were tools

When I was in kindergarden, 1st and 2nd grade, we had a whole "teach kids to be responsible for something by lending them some mascot" thing.

In kindergarden it was a dragon (which was in fact, a plastic dinosaur) named "Dragonimo". Each day a different kid was responsible for the toy and had to carry it everywhere. We even had a nice song for this thing that can be summarized to "I am able to be responsible for "Dragonimo". I was really annoyed that I had to carry this plastic DINOSAUR everywhere with me. It was ugly and boring so I didn't want it.

In 1st grade it was a stuffed elephant named Mémo after the series of educational books we were using which featured this character.

This is Mémo. I distinctly remember the yellow book Mémo 1 because of how I felt when I looked at it. It was serious business! I was a big girl now, going to school with books and all!

However, in 1st grade, we had to bring it home and bring it back the next day. Although I understood the point of it, the whole responsibility thing, I thought that it was a stupid exercise and wanted nothing of it. I was a good willed kid though and I didn't care, so I went along with the program even thought I thought it was stupid. When I brought it home a second time, my overprotective mom understood that bringing it home wasn't only a one time thing and really disapproved that I had to take this germ infested thing home every now and then. I think I asked her what I should do about it and I think she's the one who told me to give it to someone else the next time it was my turn. When my turn came next, I wanted to pass it on to the next kid, but the teacher refused. I explained to her that my mom didn't want me to bring it back home because it was full of bacteria. My teacher then instructed me to leave it in my desk, which I thought was stupid as hell. Why the hell couldn't I just pass it on to another kid if I wasn't going to take it home and bring it back, which was the whole point of the exercise? So anyway. I was happy not to have to bring it home so I didn't argue. I ended up only bringing it home twice that year.

In 2nd grade it was the same, except that the teacher didn't care so much about the exercise and the whole "responsibility" thing which was the point of the exercise. Actually, it wasn't even planned for us to have a whore to whore out that year. It was just a kid's mom who had made a replica of Mémo for us to be able to keep the of tradition of whoring him out (seriously, what a fucking bad idea). So when my turn came I just passed it on to the next kid because I thought it was stupid, pointless and uninteresting hassle and still wanted nothing of it. There were a bunch of other sheep kids who were like "You can't do that, you have to take it home." to which I answered "I don't want it" and gave it to the next person in the list who was actually part of that group of kids. Jesus christ, where had those kids put their brain? Of course I could do that. The teacher didn't give 2 shits. Couldn't they read the situation?

I changed schools often as a kid. In 5th grade I moved back from some very far away school to my first school. So we were waiting in line in front of the door in the classroom to go somewhere like the library or something. I took the chalk and wrote a small "hello" on the blackboard next to me just because. Some tool behind me told me "Hey, you don't have the right [to do that]" to which I answered with a shrug. Then he said something like "It's not because you come from somewhere else that you can do whatever you want" to which I may or may not have verbally answered, but I sure non-verbally have. My response featured a "What the shit are you saying man" face, because I guess that's the only way I knew how to express how bullshitty I thought what he was saying was. I may or may not have responded "I don't think that", but if I did, it was after having stared at him for at least a long second with my "what the shit" face while trying to figure out how to effectively call out his bullshit (yeah, weak reply. FML). But hell, what a tool. Kids are such tools.
Write "hello" on the blackboard => OMG-YOU-CAN'T-DO-THAT DRAMA.
Just shut up.